[REDACTED] is an East Anglian head-rush with a translucent blonde moustache. Unlike most writers, his facial hair actually makes him look much younger, and usually leads to an embarrassing smirk on the face of the cashier as his ID tells them he isn’t in fact just a dark-eyed fifteen year-old who’s had a hard life. The paracetamol and coffee make more sense now, as they wash up in the conveyor belt’s tide. Fifteen year-olds don’t buy coffee and painkillers with a fake ID, they buy vodka and fireworks. And they certainly don’t have trouble finding a dentist when their final wisdom tooth wakes up every six months to try and lift itself agonisingly out of their skull, impotently like the last skeletal grandpa out of the pool after 10am water aerobics, every other Thursday at community leisure, which so happens to be on the same street as three separate dentists that all have waiting lists so long that you’ll be yourself signing up for the senior’s water aerobics (and the Monday afternoon seated jazzercize if you can handle it) before you’re ever going to get seen. And, if you still somehow have any teeth left after fifty years since your last appointment, then you and your bridge buddies might as well blow if off for wheelchair yoga on Tuesdays and Fridays. And that’s a big commitment, because if you miss even one session they’ve been known to assume you’ve dipped into corpse pose and give your place away on the spot to someone with even less teeth.
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Hey, to break format for a moment here and address the theme above, I just wanted to say thank you to anyone that at all cares about this blog enough to read it on occasion. You may or may not have noticed that new writing has stalled a little lately, this is because I recently quit my job to begin studying as a school music teacher and as such have been pretty slammed these last couple months. I’m not giving up on this though, and aim to still try to upload once a week – hopefully this can be the start of that. Again, thanks for reading any of this at all if anyone ever did. I do this for me, but I’ve had a lot of fun sharing.
– W
Quit Vision 